Oh my Glob. This bag can't contain my hawt lumps.
When you're a kid, not all of your sartorial choices were your own, and that's okay. We can't all have super steezy parents who want to infuse their children with as much swag as possible. That's why, as we grow older, we start to gravitate towards clothing, grooming, and accessories that help us define who we are, and show it to the rest of the world.